Littlest (week 31)

Littlest, we had a party for you on the weekend. 

Not a baby shower, because hey, we have all the baby stuff we could possibly need, and party games aren't my thing, but just a 'hey, you're on the way and isn't it wonderful.' We combined it with my birthday party and  had a picnic in a park in the city and it was such a lovely afternoon. The weather decided to settle on perfection - being neither too hot or too cold but just right, the light was gold and dappled and all the kids played brilliantly. We had it near the Dolphin Fountain and, somewhat to my amazement no kids fell in, although Sprocket got his backside wet and threw his shoes in, but those are very minor things! 

You will be pleased to hear that you behaved beautifully, kicking just enough to let me know you were all right, but not enough to cause distress. 

I wore my 'back-up wedding dress', the one I got all those years ago in case at the last minute I outgrew the one that was mum and grannie's. I figured I'd never get another chance to wear a maternity party dress - although I'm considering wearing it as a nighty now, as it feels so comfortable and silky and it's such a waste to have it just sitting in a drawer. It seems strange to think that I'm at the same stage of pregnancy now (maybe a little under) as I was with Sprocket at my wedding! I definitely prefer the photos from this weekend - I let myself be talked into a make-up artist for the wedding, and the results were… scary. I distinctly remember looking in the mirror before we left the house and thinking I should just wash all the gunk off, but in the end I left it on and I've regretted it ever since! 

After the party we left your nana and grandpa's and returned home to our smoke-ridden town so your brother wouldn't miss any more school. Unfortunately, he was sick that night so couldn't go to school anyway. Both he and your sister came to my midwife's appointment the next day (they made a strong case that if your brother was home from school your sister should be too, to keep him company. I should never have let them persuade me…) and were very curious about what was happening. They loved hearing your heart and were interested to see the midwife check my blood pressure the same as Daddy does. We've moved on from the umbilical cord and are now talking about the amniotic fluid you swim in. Your brother wants to take you to the swimming pool to see how well you swim after all your time floating inside me. On the way in to school today we talked about all the things you will, and won't be able to do when you arrive. You will be able to feed and sleep and cry, hold their fingers and kick, you won't be able to talk or sit or walk for awhile. 

You, my littlest one, are presently still head down and your heart is doing just what it ought. 

I talked to the midwife about what to do about all the smoke surrounding us, but I still don't know if we should just pack up and move in with mum and dad until the fire's put out, or try to work around it. 

The air has seemed okay this morning - but Sunday night the stench of it woke me and it felt hard to draw breath… and when I did… it was acrid and smothering. 

I do hope it's not hurting you… the kids and I are going to pick up some of the air masks the council are giving out today. Not something I ever imagined having to do. O Little one, I do worry for you. We really haven't had any symptoms - apart from that one night - but checking the air quality every hour, so often it is deeply, deeply worrying. 

A big gust of wind has just blown up and I can see the ashes fly by, but at least there are still patches of blue. Thunderstorms are due tonight, and I'm looking forward to them washing everything clean. 

Grow well, Little one, not much longer now. 

Joining with the lovely TOI of Life of TOI and Erica of To the Sea for Blogger Baby Boom.

Littlest (Week 30) Going Retro

Littlest - you're thirty weeks old today and I'm in shock.
Only another ten (or eleven) weeks to go. Just a few seconds ago it seemed like forever until we'd get to meet you and now it seems quite close.
You're getting very large now and are beginning to be quite cramped. You're also beginning to lose all the lanugo and you can move in time to music. You are beginning to react to light. I wonder when I write at night if you move towards, or away from, the glow of the laptop screen?
You're very much settled in a solid lump on my right side. I think the big rounding just below my ribs is your rump, and the movements I feel down below are your exploring hands.
After a stressful week we've fled our home surrounded by burning coal mines, to your nana and grandpa's in the city.
The sky here is high and blue, their garden richly green and shady. It's such a relief to be away from the smoke, ash and parched land of home. To wander in the garden, to stroll down to the shops, to breath deeply.
I feel a little foolish - the moment we decided to just pack up and leave the air quality in our home town improved almost two hundred percent! For the first time in nearly two weeks we could see the stars.
However, our decision was brought about by a Country Fire Association warning saying that high risk people (children, pregnant women and the elderly and the ill)  should try to take a break from the area, and as the wind could change direction again at any moment, I think we made the right decision. Smoke is not good for you little one, and here the air is clear.
I'm so sleepy now, as we came into the city with your daddy this morning, leaving the house when the moon and stars were still up, just before five, so he'd get to work in the city by eight am, but having all the worry taken away is more than worth the yawns.
We're missing your midwife appointment tomorrow, and I do regret not hearing your heart this week, but keeping you away from carbon monoxide does seem more important.
While stuck in the house on the weekend, kept captive by the smoke, I got your daddy to take some photos of your bump while I wore one of your nana's maternity dresses from the seventies. I love knowing that my mother wore this dress while I was growing inside, but it's not going to fit me for much longer! Your nana and my nana were both horrifically sick the whole nine months, twenty-four seven and lost weight rather than gained weight in their pregnancies. I, on the other hand, am feeling wonderful and haven't been sick since about week thirteen. I am however very hungry!
In this photo I'm sitting in a cain saucer chair -also from the seventies - in your nursery corner, that I found on e-bay, and the lovely joiners around the corner fixed for free. It's just like one from our family coast home that disintegrated. It always relaxes me and reminds me of hours spent staring out to sea.
Your brother and sister are very interested in your umbilical cord at the moment and how you receive everything you need through it - Poppet fed me blackberries and blueberries today telling me they were 'for Littlest's umbilical cord.'
Littlest, your daddy's just home from work, and your granddad's just finished putting dinner on the table so I'll be going, but it's so exciting we're three quarters of the way to meeting you.

Linking with the lovely TOI of Life of TOI and Erica of to the sea for blogger baby boom.